Wednesday, July 25, 2007
Fake Game Moment!
Coming this December in a surprise followup to their sleeper hit Club House Games, Nintendo presents their first M game for the wildly popular DS, Club House Dames! You must seduce all fourteen Clubhouse Dames using only your index finger (or stylus) and any special skills you might have - like singing into the DS mic: la la la la la, la!
Play Marathon Come with Aya Matsuura!
Oh she's getting moist. Success! Orgasm!!
Round Result: You have seduced Marai Oawazawa!
Suggested Retail Value.
[fake screen cap at cafe/card game gcn girl at table, if possible - PICTURE MISSING]
With a room called Lover 7, featuring the famous Aika Miora.
Bonus preview secret exclusive: Press the stylus up, down, up, down, and say nipples into the mic to unlock Sound Test mode!
Nintendo Presents Link and Princess Peach in Yoshi's Story 2, starring Yuki Suzuki! Over ten thousand levels!
Link's new adventure going by the codename SleepingWind. You are Link and you must wake the sleeping breeze of the world! Hey wind, ah yah! Oy! Wake the fuck up! Hey, I'd love to let you sleep but it's almost one p-m and you've got to get up and call your mom and stuff. I've been up since ten but I haven't gotten anything done yet, but I'm okay with that!
My stomach's been sick all day, I think it's from all these deku nuts. Shit! What else is there to eat out here? I'm on a fucking island for some reason! I found this little tree and I went inside it and it was huge, there was a dungeon in there! A tree with a giant interior! There were maps and treasure chests and bad guys, I even could put like a million things in my pockets and you couldn't tell cause they looked flat! I flew with a leaf across this wide expanse! But now I've got to wake you up, Ms. Wind, or is it Mr.? I gotta go type this up. Level two.